Most of us struggle with knowing our value. We tend to assume it must be low.
But what if you knew your value and by learning it’s greater than you imagined, it caused you to feel better about yourself, even happy with yourself? Are you perhaps missing out on this?
Let’s consider the process how we most often measure our value.
We first begin with strong negative comparisons of ourselves with others where we come out on bottom, right? We aren’t as good looking, rich, qualified, slim, tall, educated or well liked as others. And we’ve held this opinion of ourselves for a long time, so chances are, our belief in this is ingrained.
Now, in converse to this, let’s consider some of the ways of measuring our value that may be more reasonable, meaningful, and less shallow than the previous list.
Let’s give you credit for some things that, perhaps, you haven’t considered.
First of all, one of the important things that makes you valuable is what you carry in your heart, even if you haven’t shared it with someone. Love shows up in many ways.
For example, to what extent do you find yourself caring about others, especially when you hear of someone having a hard time, even suffering? Do you find yourself feeling bad for them and wishing for their improvement? This lovingness makes you valuable.
And to what extent do you act on your caring such as by holding a caring place for them in your heart with the possibility for their improved state of affairs? More love.
To what extent do you voice your caring to another to let them know how you feel? Even more love!
I’m sure you don’t need to be reminded how much it means to you personally when you are going through a rough patch and another person is actively caring about you. They may even holding a light of hope for you or a prayer or even reach out to say something comforting. This love is valuable!
In such a case, how would you rate the value of that person in your life on a scale between 1-10? I imagine the score would be very high. High, because there’s nothing that feels better than love from another person. The person becomes valuable to us!
What we appreciate more than anything else about each other is the love that’s generously given to us. Maybe it comes even at a time when we don’t feel deserving of it. Nothing can beat that one quality of giving value. When we receive love, it literally lights us up and saves us!
A kind word, an acknowledgment, a smile, an offer to be helpful, even in a small way, goes a long way to express both another’s value as well as your own.
If you then add things more difficult, they can increase your value, such as an apology or an effort to make peace out of a hard situation in order to bring healing. These weigh in strongly with tremendous value because these things are complex for us all – and are therefore, highly appreciated! It takes even more love to surmount personal obstacles.
Most of all, if you felt that you were wronged in how someone treated you and the person disagreed with you or failed to care about your suffering, your efforts to forgive the person in order to come back to yourself and be at peace, are monumental steps in your value. This, most likely, comes from a love that you carry deep within, an unconditional love.
In fact, it is often in our hardest life obstacles and our struggle to overcome them that our value truly rises to the top. And though we may not feel great about ourselves by the time we’ve won our freedom from resenting or hating someone, or our rise to release a grievance – even against ourselves – these are the times when we are shining our brightest. And these are the times we most need to remember our hard-won value.
Here’s the bottom line. When someone feels your love, it makes you monumentally valuable!
Consider all that you are, all that you try to do, and the care you hold in your heart for others at various times and even the times that you voice your care about someone. Consider your efforts not to give up when it’s hard but to try to bring things to a higher level instead. Now where would you rate your value?
I give you a 10!