Here she is in all her glory, my companion, a ficus! Just moments before we took her down.
Many things went through my mind and heart.
When I moved here just 20 years ago, she was small. Over the years of lovingly adding mulch and organic supplements to the whole yard, she tripled in size.
As I sit in my office, I’ve had twenty years of looking through the window with admiration and appreciation. She’s been the center of focus as I ascended into higher realms of healing prayer. Her stationery position anchored me for the enormity of infinite contemplations. These daily, long term meditations inspired many healings for myself and others.
Now, she was coming down.
Was I being unfair or disrespectful for something that had added so much to my life? How much would I miss my ficus which on many days looked to me like she was lit with glory itself.
In short, I was evaluating my level of attachment, which in ancient Buddhist teachings warn that it can create suffering. Grasping and attachments can be the source of pain. Yet, there’s a fine line between appreciation and being unable to let go after a relationship has served its purpose. We suffer when we can’t release ourselves from an attachment.
I prayed and it was revealed to me that the glorious tree, which had given so much to me and even contributed to my world prayers, had come to its fruition. I reviewed how much she had taken over the entire backyard and now her roots were visible and large next to the house foundation. She’d gotten too big & invasive. It was time for her to go.
I held my breath as I avoided viewing the change. I practiced releasing sentiment. Later in the day, I stood at the dining room patio window and looked out. My yard had expanded into a whole new space. There was sunshine pouring in, and open space everywhere. No more shade yard! Instead of feeling a loss, I actually felt relieved. It was beautiful.
There’s a correlation with our relationships. Every relationship doesn’t last a life time. Yet, we somehow expect them too just because we got close to someone. We often get so attached to people in our lives that we hang on way past what is healthy for us. Attachments can be a hazardous practice.
Sometimes marriages & partnerships can become attachment based rather than love based relationships. It’s important to know the difference.
Yet what of our loved ones, those who add joy and blessing to our lives, the ones who we need to keep, who still carry great meaning?
By ridding ourselves of a toxic or muddled relationship that’s creating unhappiness, you make room for those who you truly love and who are adding to your life. They get more of you.
By setting aside fear of loss, the need to grasp, & the habit of attachment, we actually open our lives to far more possibilities. Though you can’t see what’s going to appear as a result, you stand to enjoy a great surprise by making room for what’s needed to expand in your life.
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